Last Three Months

Anxiety
Since my employment with the organization became redundant, I’ve been going through ups and downs in my mental state over last couple of months. There have been times, I’ve been super productive - doing online courses to up skill my self in continuous development, writing in the paper journal, taking walks in the evenings and so on. More about that later. There have also been days I felt totally anxious, even depressed. I noticed these have mostly been triggered by thinking about all the good as well as not so good memories in the day job from the past. I realized these triggers mostly occurred whenever I had not been keep myself busy with either physical and mental activities and needed to address this; I started to make slight changes in my daily routines. My friend Sabrina, who is a life coach, very kindly helped me with initiating some of these changes. I enjoyed the coaching sessions we had in the local coffee shop. I’m very grateful to her.

Getting to a Routine
On most days, I continued to wake up early, at least much earlier than the rest at home. Have my coffee sitting under the neem tree in the front yard; in the early days I used to take my mobile phone along with me and most recently I stopped that, because I wanted just to sip my coffee admiring the neem tree branches and leaves. I started to write in my paper journal, much regularly than before. I started to read more or listen to audio books often. In particular I had more time to read & listen to Dr. Jordan Peterson and reflect on his teachings. I made efforts to connect with a few people outside the world both online and offline, though I preferred online interactions more. I enjoyed more online conversations with Jason,I started going out for dining with a couple of good friends, whom I always had a high regard. It gave me the opportunity to experience middle eastern cuisine, more than I’ve ever done for last two decades. I enjoyed meaningful conversations we have had and learned lots about the middle eastern cuisine and region in general.

Closer to what matters
In the home front, I got more involved in helping Mrs in household chaos more than ever before - washing dishes mainly. Most importantly, I grew in spirtuality - being with family for evening prayers consistently has been a big win for me. I got more closer to the god. I had the opportunity to spend more time with the daughter, specially during our evening walks and daddy’s taxi service duties to drop/pick at the driving lessons.

Feeling God and good
I now have freedom to do what I like, to be doing & when I want to do things, I connect with people with my choice, I have more time to spend with family & friends, I don’t have to associate with incompassionate people, I don’t have to play office politics to get around, I’m not compel to agree with anything which aren’t meeting my principles & values. I mostly have peace of mind. Gradually my anxiety levels started to reduce and state of mind has started to improve. Even writing this post here brings me positive thoughts. I know, I am unemployed. That’s okay for now. When the time is right; I will get around with something meaningful. It is going to be even better ! I feel I’m more closer to the god more than ever before

Twenty Nine Years

Today mark 29 years since I first arrived in Dubai. That means today also mark as my date of joining to Emirates. It has also been customary that for expatriates recruited from overseas, the date of joining is the date people board their flight into the country.
Over last 29 years I’ve been fortunate for being part of world’s one of the most rapidly grown airlines and being able to contribute to its success. I had the opportunity to meet some of the most wonderful people both inside & outside the organization and build long lasting relationships. I had travelled most parts of the world for business and pleasure. I learned, experienced and appreciated working with people from all various cultural backgrounds. I enjoyed having had the privilege of experience of tasting wide variety of local cuisine in the various parts of the world. I had worked under extremely challenging circumstances, in setting up new stations, during industrial actions, under extreme weather conditions and even natural disasters like ash clouds.
Unfortunately the C19 pandemics and resultant impact to the industry has not been favorable to people in the industry and resizing of the organizations had to be done. I don’t think there were any other options to control expenditure, but to let some people go. I’m one of them. Though it’s sad to leave a career which I had put my heart and soul for many years, I don’t take it personally. In hindsight, I feel, I needed that nudge after having been in the same industry for almost 35 years, to pursue new ventures. I don’t know which that new venture would be just yet. But I believe it’s going to be a good one. Onwards & upwards!

Jason the 10C

Mostly I’m sad, sometimes I’m feeling too guilty for not using 10C often - Jason is working too hard to improve what we have here on 10C. And he has been for many years since we got to know him and the service. He has always been quick in responding if we face any problems with the service with a solution or even when we ask for new features. Just one single soul running his server in his own home, investing most of his own funds. So passionate about his own creation 10C. Look no more. He’s more than enough for me(us) to be inspired, not only for here, but also for any other creation whatsoever. So, what’s stopping me(even us) ?
In the end I’m not sure whether the title of this post is appropriate. That doesn’t matter too much though. This is my space. I and we can write anything as long as we don’t offend any other human being, I believe!

First time in about two weeks, I finally had something that motivated me to write in paper journal for yesterday.

Back to Bullet Journal

I am thinking of going back to pen & paper Bullet Journal again. Last time I used the system was about year & half ago for a couple of months, but did not continue when I started to maintain a Hobonichi Planner. This year I did not get a Hobonichi daily planner, instead got a 5-year journal. So, it makes sense to use a Bullet Journal for planning activities. That’s said, I want to keep my Bullet Journal simple and functional. With that in mind, I decided to use Frankenlog method - a simplified version of Bullet Journal creator, Ryder Carroll’s original Bullet Journal System

I spent a few hours this morning setting up my Bullet Journal using Leuchtturm 1917 Bullet Journal Notebook I had purchased about a couple of years ago, when we were visiting the UK. I have to I quite enjoyed setting the thing up, which also give me the opportunity to keep away from my iDevices and completely focus on real pen & paper. I know, it’s not perfect and good looking. It doesn’t have to be! All what I need is to be functional for me. And time will tell….

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I don’t know...

There has been this thought in my mind for last couple of days, whether I’m too lite hearted & humous in my business interactions with internal and external business colleagues & associates. This thought has been echoing in my head since I had to facilitate a session to a bunch of people who were visiting the HQ for training workshop from overseas. My session was about an important operational subject, although it wasn’t related to neither regulatory nor safety. I wanted the audience to feel comfortable and be participative rather than me just talking. I wanted them to have a bit of laughter. I haven’t seen their end of training feedback though. But I think I did well in covering the subject matter.
Beside the above, in this past week, I also had to facilitate a bunch of meetings with business partners in the external company that I deal with and on reflection in one of those meetings as I observed the people attending looked a bit nervous about an important upcoming event, which I’m driving for smooth launch. I wanted them to believe we can do it and there isn’t anything to be fear of and I wanted them to feel comfortable to throw any of their doubts, questions, clarifications needed at me. So, I was a bit humorous to crack a few jokes - decent ones though.
I’m now thinking whether these people would take these things lite heartedly as I’m or will they think my behavior isn’t acceptable in a business settings. Should I change my approach the way in which I handle these things, but still try to maintain my true self !

Working on a Friday

It is not often I go to work during the weekend, though I'm catching up with work emails & whatnot from home. Whilst, I don't have to be personally present in the office to get work done, my physical presence is necessary when it comes to meetings, 1 one on one meetings with my team members and of course kitchen shop floor walk arounds. Though I spend considerable time in the kitchen during the working week, I'm mostly engaged with meetings or people coming to see me to discuss matters of importance to keep our day to day operations running & alive. It is rather very difficult me to focus on just one thing at a time. It doesn't matter whether I'm in the kitchen or even in the HQ 2 I've noticed switching gears often from meetings to shop-floor to one on one meetings to emails has mostly burnt out me. Nevertheless, I have to achieve my work related goals & ever demanding expectations from my superiors consistently. I guess it comes with part of the package. Unfortunately I don't have army of people whom I can delegate as I work with an absent work force who work on shifts 24/7, except two, who also have their plates full.

After being to the kitchen this morning and spending almost six hours on the shop floor, uninterrupted I managed to achieve hell of a lots of stuff on the shop floor. I managed to get deep into some of the challenges we have been facing, though solutions still need to be further discussed and agreed with people in the kitchen. More importantly though, it was clear that at the end of good six hours or so, I was still relaxed and calm. Is this a sign that I should be better organized, structured and scehduled my week for various important projects and activities, so that I can focus my efforts even better….? I don't know, time will tell.


  1. We are still in it's infancy in on-line meetings

  2. I've scheduled to be present in the HQ at least one day in the working week - mostly on Thursdays

Back to Uni

It’s again that time of the year that I’m getting a bit sad. After little less than three weeks vacation spending time at home, daughter will be returning back to the Uni tomorrow. Even though she has been away from home for last 3 years, every time when the date is near for her return, I’m upset and sad. On a more positive note though, during her vacation this time around we had quite a few opportunities to spend quality time together both at home and outside home whenever we had gone out. The last few days though, she spent more time at home studying for her exams that will be held soon after she gets back. During the stay, we had the opportunity for some mind stimulating conversations and she even shared some of her academic work in Psychology with me, which brought new inspirations for me to explore Psychology related subject matter. More about that later.

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Renewal

Broadly the two words that I want to focus this year are Change and Renewal. These words are actually connected with areas I want to do better and improve during this year. These words are also inter dependable and interconnected in supporting what I want to achieve.

In my blog post on January the 2nd , I said that I will work on increasing the frequency of going to the church and increasing the frequency of communication with the loved ones. Whilst, I am yet to work out & document detailed specific tasks & habits I will be developing to achieve these goals, it is clear that I need to prioritize my renewal with the creator. To kick-off, what I need be doing, since I had stopped attending Fridays Prayer Meetings, for the 1st time in 79 weeks, yesterday I joined the family back in attending the prayer meetings again. I have to say, ain’t I glad that I did!

From the beginning to the end, I enjoyed the entire session that lasted about 90 minutes. I particularly enjoyed praise & workship with lovely songs like the power of love. After the spiritual activities finished as usual there was an opportunity for fellowship with snacks & coffee being served. People also sang Happy Birthday for Stephanie. During the fellowship session, people were welcoming me back. One gentleman who has been a pioneer members in the group even approached me to ask my help in serving in their Media Ministry, which I’m yet to confirm though.

After the prayer meeting, the family & I attended the mass in which Stephanie was part of the people who offered communion to the congregation. All in all it was a good, calm & peaceful start to my 2020 renewal.

Small Change

On the New Years Eve I was awake till about 0300 in the morning. Not that I partied or anything like that; but sitting down in my favorite spot at home and reflecting & pondering about the year just past by. I was thinking about what changes I’d want to make happened to improve my life and purpose of my being. Not that I wanted to come up with any new year resolutions as such, no. Not that I wanted to do a revolution to change my habits & stuff, no! Because I’m not 21 anymore 😉 But 50s isn’t too late either to change and improve a few small things, to start with. Who knows, those small things one day, some day will potentially help me to achieve big things in life. When I refer to change , I’m talking about change in both personal & work context. I wrote a bit about one area in my blog post yesterday; perhaps in a different context.

Richard Boyatzis, a Distinguished professor at case Western Reserve University has once said that intentional change involves envisioning the ideal self and to exploring the real self. 1 Here he was referring to both personal and work life. I had already started working on a Self Authoring Exercise that would help me to be able to author my future. As this exercise can and will take sometime to fully complete, rather than waiting I thought, a couple of small changes in order. I have to say, in coming up with these changes I’d like to focus on, I had not done a comprehensive self assessment of sort; it’s just that application of knowing thy self. So, for now they are going to be to increase the frequency of going to the church and to increase frequency of communication2with my loved ones. In the coming days, I will workout details on the specifics on what exactly I’m going to work on these two aspects. I’m hoping as I will be progressing with these, I would be able to grow and expand them to more bigger ones.


  1. Experience - Advice and Inspiration, Harvard Business Review, September-October 2019

  2. Offline & online