Last Three Months

Since my employment with the organization became redundant, I’ve been going through ups and downs in my mental state over last couple of months. There have been times, I’ve been super productive - doing online courses to up skill my self in continuous development, writing in the paper journal, taking walks in the evenings and so on. More about that later. There have also been days I felt totally anxious, even depressed. I noticed these have mostly been triggered by thinking about all the good as well as not so good memories in the day job from the past. I realized these triggers mostly occurred whenever I had not been keep myself busy with either physical and mental activities and needed to address this; I started to make slight changes in my daily routines. My friend Sabrina, who is a life coach, very kindly helped me with initiating some of these changes. I enjoyed the coaching sessions we had in the local coffee shop. I’m very grateful to her.

Getting to a Routine
On most days, I continued to wake up early, at least much earlier than the rest at home. Have my coffee sitting under the neem tree in the front yard; in the early days I used to take my mobile phone along with me and most recently I stopped that, because I wanted just to sip my coffee admiring the neem tree branches and leaves. I started to write in my paper journal, much regularly than before. I started to read more or listen to audio books often. In particular I had more time to read & listen to Dr. Jordan Peterson and reflect on his teachings. I made efforts to connect with a few people outside the world both online and offline, though I preferred online interactions more. I enjoyed more online conversations with Jason,I started going out for dining with a couple of good friends, whom I always had a high regard. It gave me the opportunity to experience middle eastern cuisine, more than I’ve ever done for last two decades. I enjoyed meaningful conversations we have had and learned lots about the middle eastern cuisine and region in general.

Closer to what matters
In the home front, I got more involved in helping Mrs in household chaos more than ever before - washing dishes mainly. Most importantly, I grew in spirtuality - being with family for evening prayers consistently has been a big win for me. I got more closer to the god. I had the opportunity to spend more time with the daughter, specially during our evening walks and daddy’s taxi service duties to drop/pick at the driving lessons.

Feeling God and good
I now have freedom to do what I like, to be doing & when I want to do things, I connect with people with my choice, I have more time to spend with family & friends, I don’t have to associate with incompassionate people, I don’t have to play office politics to get around, I’m not compel to agree with anything which aren’t meeting my principles & values. I mostly have peace of mind. Gradually my anxiety levels started to reduce and state of mind has started to improve. Even writing this post here brings me positive thoughts. I know, I am unemployed. That’s okay for now. When the time is right; I will get around with something meaningful. It is going to be even better ! I feel I’m more closer to the god more than ever before